today
he isn't here with me
by my side
he is away for a very short while
very short indeed
but
i ridiculously long his companionship
tears accompanied me through the night
early this morning
time rewinded
back to the moment
i first met him
i reminisced that moment
the uncontrollable fast hear-beating
the feeling of nervousness
the uncertainty of acceptance
afraid what looks might affect my feelings
afraid to look straight to where he might appear
the street
whichever way
i turned
and focused to the mirror that once was behind me and then
i was restlessly focusing on the mirror reflection
hoping to see him in that reflection
instead of straight in the eyes
the feeling of defiance
hoping that reflection will help deny any unwanted feelings
but mind over matters
and was amazingly proven
the deepest feelings
crafted inside my heart for him
has defeated whatever eyes might not favor
